Body Image: Part 1

I have what I now consider a rather nice body. However, until the last few years, I did not think that way. For one thing, I always thought I was too skinny. In fact, I was repeatedly teased by other girls who were not as thin as I for being so skinny. I even had to have a weight waver when I joined the Navy because I was too thin.

But, it was not my thinness that I really hated. It was the not so thin top half of me that I hated. I stopped growing when I was 12. As a preteen with a large chest, school was not easy. But, what made my life really miserable was my pastor telling me that I needed to cover my already well covered breasts with a larger shirt to keep the boys from lusting after me. At the time, I thought it was all my fault. Since I didn't want boys to be able to discern my body shape, I wore shirts that were about 5 sizes too big. Now, I realize that my pastor probably had his own problems and I should not have worried about it. But, he made me feel very guilty.

Over the years, I came to realize that my body was my own, and there was nothing I could do about it. Yes, I wear my shirts tighter, now. That's how Gary likes them. But, I'm no longer ashamed of my body. I would not change it. I just wish that people in a position of power had not made me feel so worthless because of a part of my body was larger than what they liked. Or, maybe it was because they liked it. Maybe they felt guilty for lusting after a pre-teen girl who had no control over the shape her body had taken. For whatever reason he did it, he should not have. To this day, I detest him for that.

There are girls out there who are being made to feel that their bodies are bad. They are being made to feel that their bodies are ugly. They are being made to feel that because of the way their bodies are made, they are one thing or another. They need to be made to feel that their bodies are beautiful. They don't need to feel beautiful in a sexualized way, rather they need to feel beautiful because they are beautiful. They are beautiful inside and outside. They have the ability to be beautiful, no matter what they look like. And, they should be made to feel that.